As leaders, we expect our team members to listen and follow our direction. We assume that our directions were crystal clear and well understood, so we expect positive results.

There are several problems with this.

The first and most impactful is that not everyone communicates the same way. What seems clear to us may be interpreted very differently by those receiving the message, based on the paradigms they have developed over time.

I grew up playing basketball for my father, and he always told me that it was my responsibility as the passer to make sure my passes were caught. The same rule applies to communication. As the sender, it is our responsibility to ensure that the message was received as intended.

Technology has made it easier than ever to transmit messages—but not necessarily easier to share meaning. Communication only truly occurs when meaning is shared between the sender and the receiver.

So as the initiator of communication, we must take responsibility for confirming that what was heard is what we intended.

Anyone who has played the telephone game as a child knows how easily messages get distorted. Anyone who is a parent has experienced this firsthand.

There is another challenge as well—our actions.

Our actions often speak louder than our words. When we communicate our beliefs and priorities, but our behavior contradicts them, our team hears a completely different message.

People don’t just hear with their ears.
They hear with their eyes.
They hear with their emotions.
They filter everything through their beliefs and lived experiences.

That is what makes communication an art form—and shared meaning so difficult to achieve.

So today, what can you change in the way you communicate to better ensure shared meaning?