“I must be speaking a foreign language.”
Most leaders have experienced the frustration of believing they communicated clearly only to receive a
result completely different from what they expected. Too often the issue is not effort or attitude — it is a
breakdown in clarity, assumptions, and communication.
Having coached more than 80 youth sports teams, I found myself muttering that phrase under my breath
more times than I can count.
And honestly, throughout my career as an operations leader, I often found myself thinking the exact same
thing.
Most of us assume that if we take the time to explain something clearly, the people receiving the instruction
will simply take the ball and run with it.
Unfortunately, leadership rarely works that way.
Instead, we often find ourselves frustrated, confused, and quietly shaking our heads wondering: “How did
this go so wrong?”
Years ago I realized something important about communication.
Have you ever spoken with someone who was learning English as a second language and they did not
understand what you were trying to say?
What do most people instinctively do?
They repeat themselves louder.
As if volume somehow creates understanding.
Leadership communication often works the same way.
We assume that because we said something, the other person automatically understood it exactly as we
intended.
But nothing could be further from the truth.
Sometimes people are distracted.
Sometimes they are listening while simultaneously thinking about five other things.
Sometimes they do not fully understand the request but are afraid to ask questions because they do not
want to appear incompetent.
Sometimes we simply were not as clear as we believed we were.
Sometimes priorities conflict. Sometimes assumptions differ. Sometimes communication simply breaks
down.
And then there are moments where people believe they understand even when they do not.
As I have grown older, my hearing has started to decline. I now find myself asking people to repeat things
far more often than I once did.
I know it frustrates people sometimes.
And if I am being completely honest, there are moments where I simply pretend I understood because I do
not want to inconvenience anyone further.
So instead, I fill in the blanks myself. I write my own script.
That realization changed the way I think about delegation and leadership communication.
Too often leaders believe that saying something once means communication has occurred.
Any parent quickly learns that is not true with children. And it is not true inside organizations either.
Clear communication requires more than speaking.
It requires shared understanding.
Communication is the art of creating shared meaning.
And unless shared meaning exists, disappointment is almost inevitable.
As leaders, it is not enough to delegate tasks and assume alignment occurred.
It is our responsibility to ensure clarity exists. To invite questions. To verify understanding. To reinforce
expectations. And to create an environment where people feel safe enough to admit when they do not fully
understand.
You cannot assume a common understanding has occurred.
You have to verify it has.
That is one of the true arts of delegation.
What conversation might need more clarity, follow-up, or confirmation today?
And where might people around you currently be writing their own script because expectations were never
truly aligned?
