Help Them Move Toward Their Goals
Have you ever wondered why well-intentioned feedback meets resistance—and trust is so hard to build?
You want to help them improve their individual performance and contribute at a higher level. But have they experienced your commitment to helping them achieve their own goals, too?
About five years ago, I read The Dream Manager by Matthew Kelly. It was a great story that helped me crystallize many of my ideas about leading people.
What stayed with me was the recognition that every person on our team has dreams and aspirations beyond the work we assign them.
They may want to advance professionally, continue their education, provide a better life for their family, or pursue something meaningful outside work. Those hopes don’t disappear when they walk through our doors.
But how often do we ask about them? And once we know, what do we actually do to help?
The book helped me see that understanding someone’s dreams is only the beginning. Our opportunity as leaders is to support them in moving toward those dreams.
That requires more than saying, “I hope that works out for you.”
It might mean helping someone develop a skill, giving them an opportunity to gain experience, connecting them with someone who can help, or making room for a conversation about their next step.
We cannot achieve their goals for them. We can demonstrate that their progress matters to us.
That is where care becomes real and trust begins to grow.
If our conversations focus only on what people need to deliver, even well-intentioned feedback can feel like another demand. When we have actively supported something that matters to them, we give them a reason to believe we want them to succeed.
Our feedback then has a relationship behind it.
Connection requires understanding what drives people and caring about their growth. Knowing their names and responsibilities is a starting point. Helping them pursue a future that matters to them takes us further.
The benefits can reach throughout the organization. People have more reason to stay, contribute, and tell others that this is a good place to work. Commitment to the mission grows when people experience a commitment to them.
But helping people cannot simply be a strategy for getting more out of them. Their hopes must matter to us in their own right.
There is a reward for the leader, too. Helping someone move toward a meaningful goal brings energy and purpose to our work.
We get to share in their progress while accomplishing more together.
People trust our care when they can point to something we have done to help them move forward.
Do you know the hopes, dreams, and aspirations of your team members?
What have you done to help them take a step toward those goals?
How might your relationships—and your organization—change if people experienced that support consistently?
This week, revisit a goal someone has shared with you. Ask what their next step is and what
support would help. Then follow through with one concrete action.
Give someone a reason to know that their future matters to you.
